Sith at work

I was complaining about a major shake up at work, until I found out that the new guy my boss would be reporting to is a former employee of my boss and they have a mentor/student/Sith thing going on. Here is how a buddy of mine responded.

Sith thing? Does this mean he killed your boss and took his place? Always there are two. Are you are the new Apprentice? Have you shed Dave Mielcarek to become Darth Malevolence? Does the hatred of your commute make you strong in the Darkside? Young fool. Only now, at your bosses end do you finally grasp the power of the Dark Commute! With each passing mile the Dark Side grows in its dominance of your destiny! The commuters are defenseless. Take your weapon - strike them down with all of your hatred; the blood dimmed tide will be loosed and the bus will fill with the scent of a butcher shop as you wade through their ichor to exit at your stop. Only then will your journey to the Dark Side be complete! Bwahahahahahaha...